Mon Petit Chou

So, I went to the supermarket last night to pick up a head of cabbage. Apparently frozen cabbage leaves are good for placing on nursing breasts (oh the things I'm learning). I marched confidently to the produce aisle. First dilemma, red or white cabbage? I decided the red might stain (possibly getting confused with beets), so went with white. Second dilemma, organic? Would organic cabbage leaves be better for Kate? Toxins, environmental responsibility, the extra 49 cents, the possibility of Kate ridiculing me for taking so much time waffling on this decision? I went with non-organic but it had me tossing and turning all night.

Day 3 (Friday) was a big day for our little family. Molly and Jacob moved from their incubators into cribs. They're still in the special care nursery but are gradually getting de-wired. They're taking turns being good breast-feeders. And, Kate came home from the hospital last night. So our new routine is to head into the hospital every 3 hours for feeding time, which takes about an hour. Then naps, food and other stuff in between. Good thing we live a block from the hospital!

Here are the kids in their cribs. Our tiny hats are too big for their little heads and of course, the hospital has the boy in blue and the girl in pink (but that can be the subject of a future blog post).

The Second Day

Great day with the kids today. We're in a routine of feeding every 3 hours, with Kate starting one of them on a breastfeed, and then they both get tube-fed. Jacob is taking to the breast like a natural, so when Kate's milk starts to flow he should be off to the races. Molly is a little more reluctant, but is getting more from her tube-feeds. As normal, they've both lost a little weight since the birth, but no problems. Molly was x-rayed today to get a good look at her feet and hands. She flies into a good little rage whenever the nurses poke, prod or discomfort her. Good to see the Rheault genes kicking in with her rejection of authority figures.

Molly and Jacob got to be held and fed by other family members today for the first time, and they got turns with Alison (their aunt and our old friend), Lois and Brent (Kate's parents), and Ben (Kate's brother). Plus Julia, who helped deliver them (and is Kate's medical partner in crime). My folks arrive on Sunday too, so the kids are definitely not lacking for enthusiastic cuddlers.

Kate after the delivery

Can you believe that my extraordinary wife is 2 hours post c-section in this picture?

3 more of Molly's 1st 24 hours

Top is Molly contemplating her first night. Middle, she actually has her eyes open yesterday pm. Bottom, she's being held by me and Jacob is in the incubator in the background.

More photos from the 1st 24 hours

Two photos from yesterday afternoon (27th). Jacob catching some zzzzs and Kate holding Molly for the first time.

First photos of the kids

Mere minutes after birth, here are Jacob (with the electrodes on his chest) and Molly in their incubators in the special care nursery.

Weight Correction and 1st day update

In the last night's chaos, Jacob's weight got miscommunicated to me in the grams to pounds conversion (there is a remote possibility that I wasn't thinking completely lucidly). So, at birth he was actually 4 lb 15oz, while Molly was 5 lb 5 oz, which makes sense because he didn't seem that much smaller than Molly. Sorry for the misinformation - never believe what you read on the web.

Today was great - much calmer than delivery day. Kate's recovery from c-section was remarkable as she looked fantastic and was able to walk to the nursery this morning, less than 12 hours after surgery. Besides some minor (easy for me to say) pain and discomfort she is not having any health problems and her energy level is great. The kids are in the nursery in incubators, hooked up to all sorts of monitors. They seem to be progressing well. They both started out on IVs for hydration and to keep their glucose levels stable. Jacob has already had his removed and both are being fed a combination of formula and Kate's pumped breast milk through a nasal-gastro tube. Kate did a couple of "practice" breast-feeds with them, but they'll be relying on the tubes for a while to ensure they don't lose too much weight. It's a little difficult having the kids in the incubators instead of with us all the time, but it does mean that Kate is better-rested, and most importantly that the pros are keeping a close eye on the kids during the fragile early days. We spend lots of time visiting them in the nursery, stroking them through the "portholes" in the incubators, and occasionally taking them out for cuddles.

I will try to post photos although I seem to be having trouble tonight. If it doesn't work I'll try again in the morning before heading back to the hospital. For now you'll have to trust me that the kids are gorgeous, Kate looks like she just stepped off a runway, and fatherhood hasn't made me any cuter.

We're A Family of Four!!

Jacob Rheault Hazel and Molly Rheault Hazel arrived on June 26, 2007 at 8:55pm. Kate and the kids are all doing well. I'll post photos tomorrow - I'm just home to catch a few winks and I left the camera with Kate at the hospital.

We went into the hospital at 4am after Kate's contractions got strong and regular. Her cervix dilated slowly throughout the day and we thought we were on the verge of a vaginal delivery, but the last centimeter proved to be a stubborn one, so ultimately we switched to c-section.

Molly came out first and weighed in at 5lb 6 oz and appears very healthy. When stuck with needles or otherwise provoked, she manages to turn bright red and express her outrage. She has two club feet, which we've known about since early in the pregnancy. We'll begin treatment in the coming weeks and and expect that she'll be "corrected" before she would be walking anyway. Mia Hamm and Troy Aikman are amongst the famous athletes who had this birth defect.

Jacob weighed 4lb 3oz, considerably less than his sister and less than the ultrasounds had predicted. He's actually longer than Molly, but he's all skinny limbs. They're keeping a closer eye on him because he is smaller, but he doesn't seem to have any problems at all.

Both kids are in cozy incubators, recovering from their tumultuous journeys.

Kate managed the long day really well. The epidural kept her discomfort to a minimum during the labour process. She is now recovering from the c-section and is feeling pretty groggy. She was a complete trooper all day and handled everything with remarkable good cheer and courage.

I feel like one of those inarticulate Stanley Cup winners who says "It really hasn't sunk in yet. I don't know what to say." I do know that the feeling of sitting by Kate's head, holding her hand and then peering over the curtain to see the two, slimy little guys getting pulled out, and then hearing them scream their plaintive first cries completely blew me away. Reaching into the incubators and holding their grasping hands and stroking their tiny faces is remarkable.

Photos tomorrow. Promise.

Off to the hospital in the morning

Here's Kate with the two quilts, finished in the nick of time. We're heading into the hospital tomorrow morning to be induced, so the kids should arrive tomorrow or Wednesday.

We have a list from the hospital of items we should bring with us. The list includes "light snacks", to which Kate said, "we don't need those, they have food at the hospital". I said "the light snacks are for me". So I have some pretzels and M&Ms packed and ready to go.

The Big Day is Near

Just had our obs appointment this morning and it's agreed that we're going in tomorrow morning to begin inducing the delivery. And it could even happen before then. All signals are positive. So, by tomorrow or Wednesday we should be parental.

Dave Eggers and the Lost Boys

Just finished reading Dave Eggers' "What is the What?", a novel based on the life of a young Sudanese man. It is a fantastic account of what has to be the most amazing, harrowing, courageous story of our lifetime - The Lost Boys' trek across southern Sudan to Ethiopia, and subsequently to Kenya.

I've read a couple of other books on this subject, "They Poured Fire On Us From the Sky", which is a harrowing and poignant account by three of the Lost Boys. And "Beasts of No Nation" which doesn't explicitly name which country its child soldier is from, but which felt more like an academic exercise than a novel.

I had doubts about a white American doing justice to the story, but the voice really works. Eggers is one of my favourite writers. I loved "A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius", which is a memoir of him raising his younger brother after his parents die. More out-loud laughs than any book I've read since. The style is completely original and I thought it truly was genius. I also enjoyed "You Shall Know Our Velocity" (definitely not the same class as Staggering Genius though), and short story collection "How We Are Hungry". Eggers is also a pretty fascinating guy, filling the rest of his time with McSweeney's and the eclectic and essential "Best American Non-Required Reading" anthology.

Eggers is fantastic, but I was still surprised by how great What is the What turned out to be.

Give it up Clooney

We saw Oceans 13 last night. It was smug, unoriginal and dull. What did we expect from a sequel to a sequel to a remake of a bad movie? Well, we got what we expected, but we did enjoy a Friday night out with no kids. Perhaps the last for awhile?

Life in Centerburg

We made it past 36 weeks and still no news on the pregnancy front. 36 weeks is average for twins, so this is the first of a lifetime of irrational boasts that my kids are exceptional.

Strolled down to the Farmers' Market this morning to pick up some stuffed olives and a sausage lunch. Our idyllic, small-town life is right out of Homer Price. Another walk for ice cream this afternoon and to watch the boats launching at the marina.

Daily Roundup

I went for a long bike ride out the Uhthoff trail yesterday, into the woods and farmland outside Orillia. I'm being forced to increase my exercise regimen since our pregnancy diet seems to consist of ice cream on the waterfront each and every evening.

We got registered at the hospital today and did a non-stress test to ensure that the babies are continuing to thrive on the inside. And they are, so no imminent induction.

Kate should be finishing her second quilt today. I'll post a photo when they're done.

We're off to the big city of Barrie tonight for Julia's birthday dinner.

Adopting Mei-Mei From China

Kate and I began the China adoption process in late summer 2005. During that fall, as we completed our homestudy and gathered all the documentation, it was projected that we would be heading to China around October 2006. Unfortunately the timing of our application coincided with a drastic slowdown in China. The reasons are somewhat opaque, but possibly due to: an increase in applications from around the world, an increase in domestic adoption in China, increasing wealth in China leading to fewer abandonments, and a desire by the Chinese government to appear as though there are fewer orphans. The wait time has increased from 6 months to 19 months, from file submission to referral, and that wait continues to lengthen every month. So, if we weren't pregnant, I estimate that our group wouldn't be traveling to China until January to June 2008. If we weren't pregnant, I can't imagine how heartbroken we would be by these delays.

China has a very sensible rule that they don't want adopters bringing home a child if there are any babies in the house under the age of 1. So, we will be putting the adoption on hold. Getting back into line is also a bit of an unpredictable process, but I hope that we'll end up heading to China in the fall of 2008, when the twins are 15-18 months old.

Bolder people sometimes ask (and I suspect others sometime wonder more discreetly) why we would proceed with the adoption when we've managed to get pregnant. We have been talking about and imagining Mei-Mei for over two years (much longer than we've been able to conceptualize Jacob and Molly). Although she is not yet born, she feels very real to us and it won't really feel like our family until she joins us. Also, adoption was never an option of last resort for us. We had talked about it as a possibility long before any infertility issues arose, and we signed up for China because we felt ready to start a family, not because our infertility options had been exhausted.

Idi Amin

We finally saw Last King of Scotland last night. Great performance by Forrest Whittaker but the movie didn't blow me away. For the gazillionth time, Hollywood decided that if they're going to tell a black story, they'd better tell it through the eyes of a white person so that audiences will be able to relate. Examples?

• To tell Steven Biko's story, do it through a white journalist - Cry Freedom
• Civil rights lynchings in the south? Go with the white cops - Mississippi Burning
• The first all-black regiment in the US Civil War. Let's go with their white colonel - Glory

And in the case of the Last King, the young, white doctor protagonist did not even exist in reality. The character is apparently loosely based on Bob Astles, who wasn't a doctor, and certainly wasn't a young, naive, puppet of Amin. He was 51 when he joined Amin and was a former soldier, political operative and wealthy businessman.

Last King alluded to the maribu storks, possibly the ugliest beasts on the planet, resembling dirty old flashers in overcoats. Kate and I spent time in Kampala separately, and we both heard about how the storks became ubiquitous in the capital during the time of Amin, as they feasted on the bodies of his slaughtered political opponents. You still see the birds, perched on nearly every lamppost in town.

Another Good Ultrasound Session

Mom and kids continue to be the model of good health at 35 1/2 weeks gestation. It turns out that a 5 year obstetrics residency taught Kate to be an excellent pregnant woman. The kids are now estimated to each be 5 1/2 pounds, so right on track.

Happy Father's Day

Here's a story from yesterday's Healthy Babies session, a propos of Father's Day.

The facillitator separates the group in two teams: men and women. Then gives each team about 20 cards, each including a strategy for dealing with a crying baby (breastfeed, walk around, put in a swing, check diaper, etc.). Then she turns on the stereo and plays a tape of a loudly crying baby, and tells us to put the cards in the order of how we would like to handle the situation.

Of course, the purpose is to stimulate discussion as there's no, single, right answer. But the other purpose of the exercise is to show that the women spend half the time tut-tutting about the mens' proposed answers.

And a happy father's day to my dad - I'm about to put into practice everything I picked up from him through the years. I hope I can do so with the calm, patience and kindness that he has always shown.

Healthy Babies

We had an all-day "Healthy Babies" session today down in Barrie. It was good to meet other pregnant couples, learn about breastfeeding, talk about baby issues, etc.

During a discussion of what were the biggest worries or concerns about becoming parents, it was interesting that the top two issues for the group were: fear of the unknown (not wanting to make mistakes, not having any experience, etc); and concern that parents/in-laws/friends would be jumping in with uninvited advice and criticism.

I think it's really hard for family and friends to find that balance - when new parents are desperate for reassurance and useful tips but are also hyper-sensitive about having their parenting judgments second-guessed. And everyone is sleep-deprived, so possibly not on their best behaviour. I hope that our approach will be to try to soak up all the advice and input we can, and then to try to have the confidence to go our own way based on what we think is right. And I think parents have a better feel than anyone for what is right for their own kids.

Pre-Pregnant Kate

I thought it would be good for the purpose of balanced reporting to show a pre-pregnancy photo of Kate. Here she is looking gorgeous at Priya's wedding last fall.

Get This Woman Some Twins

With Kate now home from work, I'm spending an inordinate amount of time traipsing from one strange female-centric hobby store to the next. I may be the first guy to ever have entered some of these establishments. And I don't men are missing much. So, in descending order of coolness, I rank them like this (Kate is into all except the last on the list):

• garden centres (75:25 female:male ratio, all ages, they're growing food and beautiful things - this makes sense to me)
• knitting stores (100:0 ratio, all ages, pretty trendy so not as uncool as you might think)
• quilting stores (100:0 ratio, skews older, pretty frumpy but nice grandma-types)
• fabric/sewing stores (100:0 ratio, middle-aged, very doughy, these places give me the creeps)
• scrapbooking (100:0 ratio, young to middle-aged, possibly the lamest, cutesy hobby ever. Putting stickers and stamps into books, decorating with frills and lace. I don't get it)

Kate in her garden

Here's Kate in front of the house - 35 weeks tomorrow. Several people have commented on how tiny she is. Clearly I haven't been posting the right pictures. This one better demonstrates the basketball-up-the-shirt-look.

Note the squirrel-proof birdfeeder (lever closes shop on anything heavier than a bird). There's nothing better than sitting on the porch, drinking coffee and watching the frustrated squirrels. Good times.

I've also posted a new, springtime photo of the house on the right-hand side of the blog.

The Car Seat Scam

The infant car seats are now installed. Apparently we're supposed to take the car to the fire station to get the seats checked for safety. What a total scam concocted by new moms wanting to flirt with firefighters. I think I'll have to do this one alone.

Our hospital bag is packed too, so we're ready to go at a moment's notice. It may still be 3 weeks but we're prepared. Of course, we live one block from the hospital, so all of this prep is pretty unnecessary since I can just be sent home to pick up things we've forgotten.

It's scorching hot, which is great unless you're pregnant. So we're not venturing too far from home.

The Weekend Roundup

We went down to T.O. yesterday to visit Ben and Lori in their great, new, High Park pad. Included a little shameless consumerism, to buy car seats, a rug for the kids' room, and a baby changing pad so we now have a changing station on each floor of the house. We are totally set for stuff.

Watched the Federer-Nadal match this morning - awesome rivalry and storyline, although the quality of the tennis in the final was lower than hoped for. Still, I was inspired to go for my longest run of the year - 12km (at such a horrendously slow pace that I'm not sure it can even be called a run).

Then, drumroll please... I fixed the sink. Well, Kate stepped in at one point as my frustration level mounted, but anyway, it's working and not leaking. Only cold water so far - details, details.

Polished off the weekend with a burger BBQ.

Kate has a very strange gurgle in her tummy, but otherwise all is well on the pregnancy front.

BBQ

Last night we barbecued (yes, that's the BBQ that Chris built) with Scott & Julia - a greek feast of souvlaki, merguez sausages, homemade tsatziki and a greek salad. Followed by a walk to the lakeshore for ice creams.

We picked the right night, as we had a big thunderstorm tonight.

Really Cool Hobbies

Kate gets pretty obsessive about her hobbies (gardening, knitting, running, etc.), but she only ever focuses on one at a time. Right now it's quilting, and she HAS to finish two quilts before the kids arrive. Very sexy hobby.

I spent the day trying to fix our clogged and leaking sink. Plumbing is neither my hobby nor my vocation. I took the sink apart and dealt with the clog. Probably good practice for diaper-changing as the pipes were filled with the most horrendous, toxic, vile sludge ever. Then I put the sink back together again. The clog is fixed, but the leak is a hundred times worse. Guess I know what I'll be doing tomorrow. I'll probably make it worse a few more times before caving in a calling a professional.

Two Very Different Films

This link might not be of interest to everyone, but if you've got a little of the math nerd in you, or a soft spot for the English intellectual type, this is a really poignant 45 minute documentary. It captures Andrew Wiles' lifelong quest to solve Fermat's Last Theorum.

On a lighter note, we saw Knocked Up on Tuesday night - very funny and quite topical for our current circumstances, but not quite a classic by the There's Something About Mary standard. I'd put it a notch below 40 Year-Old Virgin. Kate liked it too (possibly more than I did), despite all the obstetrical misinformation.

Ted Survives

After taking Ted to the trauma unit (he's recovering well), Kate and I stocked up on all the remaining baby "necessities". After I filled all the bedroom power outlets with those plastic thingies, Kate commented that it may be awhile before the kids are scampering to the kitchen, grabbing a fork, returning to their room and jamming the fork in the outlet. But if it helps me sleep at night, I'm cool with being a little nerdy.

Our good friend Joanna Wedge just sent me a great e-mail filled with newborn tips that I've printed off and am going to study with Kate. Besides having two little ones at home, her official job title is "International Child Protection Consultant", so I'm taking her seriously!

I'm off to read some more Baby Whisperer!

Support the head, support the head!!

With panic setting in, Kate and I spent part of this morning reviewing diaper techniques. As long as the kids don't squirm any more than Big Ted we should be okay.

Pearl Jam lyrics

I thought the funniest misheard lyrics ever were my old friend Dave thinking that Dire Straits was singing "Money for nothing and your cheques for free". Then Alison came along and thought that Elton John's Tiny Dancer song was actually an ode to "Tony Danza". But this YouTube clip (courtesy of Bill Simmons) of Pearl Jam misheard lyrics is truly fantastic. It almost induced Kate into labour.

And they're still growing

Bi-weekly ultrasound went well today. The kids are both head down and jostling for pole position. They're up to 4lb 10oz and 4lb 11oz, so each are around the 50th percentile compared with singleton babies.

That's over 9 1/2 pounds of babies plus two placentas that Kate is lugging around. And yet Kate is looking more and more "bootylicious" (shout out to Serena) every day.

Kate at 33 weeks

Kate with a fascinated Erin in Montreal this week.

Multi-Sport Dominance

After my humiliating loss in golf I sought solace by dominating Kate at soccer and Sean at hoops.

Me and Eldrick

Tiger Woods and Me:
Both prodigiously talented.
Both expecting babies in July (well Tiger's only expecting one).
Both married to Scandinavian blonde bombshells.
Both struggle on Royal Montreal's Blue Course.

I got annihilated by dad this week on his home course. But I'm in good company as Tiger missed the cut here in his first appearance and performed dismally his second time around.